When everything shut down in 2020, I kinda just shut down too. A lot of my artist friends who were in the same boat as I was, pivoted and shifted their art from in person to more online, but I found that I couldn’t follow suit. At first my excuse was, my tech was too old, too out dated, then it was that my work didn’t really translate well to an online model, and finally I just didn’t have the energy.
What it really boiled down to…
The world as I knew it changed. There was a lot of information going around but not a whole lot of knowledge. There was so much I had no control over; no money coming in, no way to know when that was going to change. People getting sick, some getting really sick, and knowing that I fell into the category of people for whom getting Covid-19 could potentially be catastrophic. Everyone around me was anxious and scared, and I found that I just couldn’t deal with everyone else loosing it, when I could barely hold it together for myself.
So I did the only thing I could do when everything around me was falling apart.
I hid away in paint and paper. Every day I’d walk downtown to my studio, grateful that I was able to do that much, and I buried myself in my work. And my work started getting tighter and more detailed, because the one thing I had absolute control over was where the paint and paper went on the canvas. Everything around me could be an unmitigated mess, but at least I had that much control over a tiny area of my life.
I spent 2020 digging into and healing the trauma from my childhood as a way to deal with the new trauma stemming from isolation… from fear… from loneliness… from 2020.
I’m starting to come out of what has felt like an emotional coma. There’s a sense of hope again, a sense that things could actually improve, get better. The business side of my art took a hit, but I found a job in the meantime to keep things afloat. There are some art shows that are hopeful to actually happen this fall, and I’m working towards getting myself back out there. I may succeed, I may not, but it feels good to have that goal on the horizon. A deadline to work towards.
With the last stimulus that went out, I was able to start upgrading some of my tech. So, with that excuse blown out of the water, I should be able to add more content besides just posting pictures… which I still will continue to do for those people who follow my Instagram and Facebook accounts. I’d like to add more videos of work… works in progress, but also work that people could follow along and do from home.
I have a couple of series of works that I will start to share and talk about, one I’ve been working on for a couple of years and another I’m just starting. Both series are still in the works, and both go in directions that is very meaningful to me and I look forward to sharing.
My painting events are still in hiatus, but with the newer tech, and hopes for video content, Painting with a Twist may just get an upgrade.
So that’s my update.
I may have been quiet, but I’m still here, and I still plan on being here for a while longer. I’m just keeping on keeping on.